Wednesday, 29 September 2010

sI Vis aMari... aMa...!


si vis amari... ama!

if u wanted t0 b l0ved... l0ve...!

wah... bergune jugak ilmu latin aku yang dah lame berkarat.. mentang2 larh exam latin dah abes last sem.. terus lupe semua...! tapi satu bende yang aku belajar dari bahase latin nie dye punye kata2 pujangga...fuh... memang terbaek larh...dulu bef0re exam kene hafal banyak sangat2 kate2 pujangge nie.. sampai terbawak2 dalam tid0... seems like ade jgak hikmah aku tak dapat 'avt0mat' ari tue... 'avt0mat' nie bukan aut0matic ker.. aut0mobile ker.. tapi dye macam pelepasan dari amek exam... 0rang2 yang terpaling hebat jer dapat...

back t0 da t0pic.. apesal tibe2 datang ayat yang sedap nie...? ni adalah kerana.. (mcm karangan bm ler pulak...!).. petang tadi kak nad bru jer lpas cuci gambar dari tempat yang jaouh... mne ntah... credit t0 kak nad...! makaceh yek... pastu aku pun ape lagi... amek sume2 gambar.. gambar aku kat msia, cuti summer ari tu ngan family, time raye ari tu kat russia, and byk lagi... and dec0rate...! sekarang kat bilik aku ade satu ruang untuk gambar jer.... yang bertajuk..
'si vis amari.. ama..!'

nie larh hasil nyer.... lawa tak..? lawa tak..? lawa tak..?
tapi tak isi gambar sampai penuh satu board lagi.... tyme aku buat bende nie... aku dapat rase satu kepuasan yang teramat sangat...

tapi kan... tujuan sebenar aku bwuat sume tu sebab aku tensi0n sangat2 dengan physi0logy lecture... time awal2 tu aku dapat catch up lagi... tapi bile dah sampai 20 minit akhir... bahagian yang penting2... memang dah L0ST ALL OUT...!!!!!!! yup... memang selalu larh macam tuh.. i couldnt concentrate f0r a very l0ng tyme... s0, aku pun wat decision tak salin ape2 and dengar jer and fahamkan... later bru teng0k kat n0te lecture kawan2... tp klu asal lepas kelas physio jer... tak kire larh praktikal class ker... lecture ke... aku memang tak tahan... sume rase ade dalam badan....

lpas jer lecture tuh... tr0s bad mood aku tyme kelas ruski... rase senang jer ayer mate nie nak keluar.. klu tanyer ape2 pun rase nak menitik jer... well, i'm n0t a strong pers0n... seriously... i'm weak... s0, sorry larh kat groupmate2 aku yek.. c0z aku mmg tak dapat nak cooperate sangat tadi... rase nak mengamuk jer... s0rry again... plus dah ler c0mbine kelas ngan group k.. s0rry jgak kat group ihsan yek... h0pefully never happen again!
=)

other then that is because... i miss my family... a lot..! that's why most of the pic are when i was having summer break in malaysia... about my family.. my holiday trip and so 0n..hopefully it can give me s0me strength t0 live in this country... and continue studying....

its all about giving me strength t0 live on day by day...

but 0ne thing i was n0t sure rite n0w is about me... my decision... when we need to intr0duce ourselves at russian class this evening.. we had been asked about what is my favourite subjectin second year... my turn is 2nd fr0m the back... i kept thinking.. but t0 my surprise was that... i couldnt figure any subject that i like...! NOTHING at all until my turn... i cant say anything...! then the lecturer asked me... d0 you like medicine... the same answer were given... SILENCE...! and that's what i'm not sure rite n0w....
d0 i like medicine...????

i think one day u guys will reach this stage where u think its hard f0r you.. just like me... and u will know how i fell it.. i asked my seniors about it.. then they t0ld me that they als0 had taught about it bef0re.. when they are 2nd year.. 4th year.. even m0re than once... but still, they keep learning... and learning... and learning... because being a doctor is all about learning... even when u have graduate later on...

but n0 worry... i think i'll just take this challenge as a stepping st0ne for me t0 m0ve on with my life... and just follow the flow with my best shot...! at least that's all i can do rite n0w.. even i dont rilly like most of the subjects.. i'll just d0 my best till i l0ve it... i'll do it f0r myself... i'll d0 it for my parents...

and i've been reading a novel rite n0w... title.. VERSUS.. by Hl0vate... its kind of nice st0ry about a girl and als0 a boy who tried to b nice... but first of all, u need to define 'nice'... wut is it nice t0 you...??? then only u can b nice.... its about university student who tried t0 find his true self... and her true self...

versus... by hlovate... nice story~

s0metimes i think that the changes are all there around me... i've been in m0st of their 'places'... i am trying a bit by a bit... but it's kind of hard f0r me t0 maintain everything... every time i try.. i fall apart again and again.... i guess i just need t0 keep trying~

btw... t0m0rr0w going t0 mosc0w... got s0me dinner with kementerian belia dan sukan... maybe its time f0r me to get s0me fresh air after this tiring week... h0pefully everything will b just ok...! insyaAllah...
=)

5 comments:

  1. fiyuhhh... abis semua kata2 yg tersirat dlm hati tu di luahkan disini?? cara yg sgt baik utk melepaskn tekanan emosi.. xkacau spe2 pon kn.. bgus2.. ct, k.fiza tawu line yg ct amik ni sgt mencabar.. bkn senang nk get through this especially that kind of feeling kn.. k.fiza stdy xsesusah ct tp pd awlannya pon k.fiza xsuka dgn ape yg k.fiza stdy.. tp disbbkn my dad yg nk then k.fiza pun ok kn jela.. but i believe sume org hadapi bnde niy ct.. satu tahap dimana kita rsa 'ENTAHLAH.. 'TAK TAHULAH'.. 'BETUL KE NIY'.. ni semua proses utk menjadikn kita lebih matang dlm menghadapi mcm2 lg perkara akn dtg.. niat kita kerana ibu bapa tu dah cukup kuat utk berjaya.. kuatkn hati ct.. kamu kn harapan ibu dan ayah kamu.. tak sia2 mereka lepaskan ank gadis mereka jauh2 berkorban utk dpt kejayaan hidup.. ckp cmni kt ct, k.fiza tringat wktu k.fiza bljr dlu.. pnah je gagal teruk pastu ingt nk giveup dah.. tp sbb terfikirkn ibubapa yg byk melabur kt kita utk tgk kita brjaya.. rse xpelah.. pasti ade sesuatu yg baik menunggu kita di depan nati.. skrg mase utk susah.. senang2 kemuadian nati.. kuatkan hati ya... kamu pasti boleh.. jd contoh trbaik utk adik2.. seorg kakak yg kuat!! semua org syg ct k.. ct.. ct.. ct.. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. wah.....panjang lebar kate2 semangat dari kak fizah...!dah kire bleyh wat bl0g dah niew... mesti lagi lawa dri ct punyer! hik3...

    btw... bt0l tu kak fizah.. ct tulis bl0g nie pun sebab bleyh express feeling tanpe kcau sape2 pun... klu kt fb nnti macam2 pulak orang c0mment.. em0 larh. itu larh. ini larh. klu kat cni okeyh jer semua... c0z dis is my blog.. =)

    thanx a lot yek kak fizah, f0r da w0nderful advices.. ur story about ur experience itself... and a very nice everything~
    thank u..
    thank u..
    thank u...
    rilly give me s0me h0pe to survive this....

    lots of love...
    schajar~

    ReplyDelete
  3. salam.....
    sory lmbt reply.. hehe.. kalo k.fiza nk wat blog pun myb nk wat bisnes2 sket.. almaklum la duit kne kumpul byk2 sket.. byk nk pkai duit skrg ni kn.. sume org sibuk bisnes nowdays.. my pleasure ct.. byk2kn pkr positif aje k.. it will helps a lot insyaAllah.. ckp senang insyaAllah lame2 bole jd snang kn kn.. :)

    by the way k.fiza bce paper rini ade cite psl stdnt prubatan kt bandung yg meninggal. rsau je. haih. ct kalo de sakit pape bgtaw taw. jgn simpan sorg2. fam xde dkat. pape jd nati at least dpt take action awal2.

    ReplyDelete

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